Friday, 21 September 2012

curious case of an ex

I got a text from my ex letting me know that today is the day he moves on as I left him incapable of loving someone else in the past. Today must be the day that should go down in history of his life as being this magical day when he wakes up and sees the world around him in this new light, where I don't exist anymore. Err... rewind to last month, I wasn't there then either, or last to last, or last to five months last - so why this sudden reminder of my selfish cold-hearted nature? This post is aimed at all people like him including both the genders who get this sudden impulse to throw their baggage at others. I can't possible be the only problem in your life when it takes you so much time to move on. But I'm not whining about your own personal issues here, am I?

Oh, and let's rewind this back to the place where I wasn't your girlfriend in the first place. This post is hereby named, curious case of an ex friend. We did not even date to compensate for the hallucinatory idea that I left you incapable of loving someone. I as a friend supported you, gave you good career advice and almost every time told you to focus on your life, that's what a good friend usually does. One-sided love, we all fall in for that; having feelings for friend which might not get reciprocated- even that experience I've  undergone but in both the cases, I know deep down it's a suicide mission. I love someone and that someone does not love me, so if I can't get myself ready for getting hurt and then in the end blame that someone else, I'm just being a moron. No, my dear ex-friend, I'm not calling you a moron. But if you're smart enough, which I think you're, you should know that if you were actually cutting me off from your life, you'd have done it without informing me. You're angry, you're hurt and a million other things, you want me to apologize, which I don't have any issue doing it but I refuse to do so. Because it would mean that the sole cause for your sorry state lies with me. That is not true. 

I haven't heard a single accepted definition of love so far, but when people tell me why they hate someone accompanied by hundreds of justifiable reasons, I often accept them. My ex-friends for hating me is also somehow acceptable. This is why I don't like friends falling in love with other friends, somehow they fail to see that the other friend might be impervious to their feelings because there are things you look for in a lover and some in friends. You might just lose a lover, but for someone else it's losing a friend, which might mean a lot more to that person. Lovers don't last, neither do love forever but as hard as it might be to believe, some friends do. And just for the record, you were not just my ex-friend, you were an ex-best friend and you've no clue what it is to lose one such person from your life because I will be replaced easily, you -- won't be.

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